Going Gray - Would You?

by Valerie Gladstone — December 28, 2007

Not long ago, The New York Times came out with an article pegged to the publication of Anne Kreamer's new book "Going Gray." And boy did it start women talking. There's hardly a woman over 35 who hasn't dealt with the decision of whether to color her new--OMG--gray hairs. 51-year-old Ms. Kreamer seemed particularly brave (and pretty in her photo) in chronicling her change back to her original shade or in other words, how she got over her addiction to hair dye. Her transformation began in part because she was horrified that she had spent $65,000 on hair coloring over 24 years.

I know a few women, all attractive, who have opted not to dye their hair. (And, of course, there are Emmylou Harris, Toni Morrison, and, ahem, Queen Elizabeth II.) They look good because they keep themselves and their hair very stylish. But most women wouldn't even consider it, feeling by going blonde or anything else but gray, they keep their professional currency, attract boyfriends, disguise their age, and even fool themselves into thinking they are younger than they are.

Curiously, when Kreamer posted pictures of herself with gray hair on the personals site Match.com, she got more action than when she used pictures of herself as a brunette. She thinks this proves that people don't automatically think of the gray-haired person as older and less attractive. Maybe. Maybe not. Possibly the guys who contacted her all had mother complexes.

For all her courage, Kreamer has a few things going for her that protect her from the prejudices other women might face if they went gray. She's attractive, middle-class, in a long marriage, and works on her own. Those without her advantages could end up with fewer life choices if they didn't color their hair. And going gray hardly means that you are dishonest, as she implied. I wonder if she wears lipstick!

What you think? What will you decide?