The Unexpected Ex

by Gwen Cooper — April 11, 2007

I got a phone call late yesterday afternoon from an ex-boyfriend named Trevor, whom I hadn’t heard from in almost four years.

“I’m standing at the front table of the Barnes & Noble in the Village,” he said, “and I’m holding a book with your name on the cover.”

“Dammit!” I exclaimed. “You mean there’s some other writer named Gwen Cooper who also has a book coming out this week?!” And the two of us laughed.

“Seriously, though, I had no idea you were even writing a book.”

“Well, you and I haven’t spoken in about four years,” I reminded him.

Despite our long spell of non-communication, the two of us agreed to meet for a celebratory drink. I was happy about it, actually. Trevor was always one of those ex-boyfriends with whom you know things aren’t meant to work out, but looking back on it all years later, you have a hard time remembering exactly why that was so.

The two of us met at the bar of a place called the Mermaid Inn, a seafood restaurant in the East Village where I was meeting some friends for dinner. We ordered cheap red wine and talked about how our lives had changed since we’d last spoken. When last we’d met, Trevor was working toward a Ph.D. in comparative literature. Now he’s gone in an entirely different direction, teaching physical education to developmentally disabled kids. “As you can see, I’ve essentially reconciled myself to a life of poverty,” he said.

“You should try being a writer,” I suggested. “Being a writer is like owning a printing press that literally just keeps on printing money.” The two of us laughed.

There was a lot of laughter as we drank and talked, and all in all I’d have to say it was one of the most pleasant hours I’ve passed in a long time. It didn’t make either of us feel as though we should take a stab at being a couple again, but it did make Trevor wonder aloud if maybe the two of us couldn’t be friends.

I told him about the blog I wrote a week back, describing how I’d never been very good at remaining friends with my ex boyfriends.

“Maybe it’s time for you to try something new,” he offered.

Maybe, indeed…

Gwen Cooper is the author of Diary of a South Beach Party Girl, to be published this month by Simon & Schuster.