Taxicab Confessions

by Gwen Cooper — June 27, 2007

If you live in New York long enough, you'll find that you rack up your fair share of interesting encounters with cab drivers over the years. I've had cab drivers offer me their theories on life, love, art, politics, and the general state of the world. I had a cab driver once show me a discarded condom he'd picked up from the floor of the backseat of his cab (I cleared out of there so fast, I left a dust cloud and one of those bee-yong! sound effects the Road Runner makes). Another once gleefully announced that he'd just dropped off two strippers about to go on shift and watched them make out in the backseat. I've had cab drivers hit on me and hit me up for various opinions and favors. One cab driver, upon learning I was a writer, handed me a copy of a manuscript for a romance novel written by his mother. Another, upon discovering he was dropping me off at a party for Sony Music at Spice Market, handed me a stack of demo CDs for his band and asked me to hand them out to any execs I might talk to. "Hey--ya never know," he remarked philosophically.

Indeed.

Eventually cab driver chatter becomes so much white noise in the background of your Manhattan existence, along with ambulance sirens and construction workers' jackhammers. But I was stuck in traffic yesterday for a loooooong time, and my cab driver and I got to know each other quite well. He told me he'd been happily married for over 30 years, and, when I told him about this blog, he asked me to share some of his relationship rules and advice with my readers. His suggestions seemed pretty good, actually, so I thought I'd pass them along. Remember--these are his tips, not mine (hence their seeming to be written from the male point of view).

My Cab Driver's Three Rules for Men, to Keep Women Happy:

My Cab Driver's Three Rules for Women, to Keep Men Happy:

And, finally, some advice for men and women both: Never say you'd never cheat on your partner. Eventually, one day, you'll want to. If you say you'd never do it, then you won't be prepared to keep from doing it when that day comes. Admitting you want to is the first step in not doing it.

Gwen Cooper is the author of Diary of a South Beach Party Girl, recently published by Simon & Schuster. To read all of Gwen Cooper's posts in "The Dating Life," click here.