The Two-Day Industry Standard

by Benjamin Todd — November 9, 2007

If you haven't seen SWINGERS, you should. Well, first, you should crawl out from under the rock you've been living under (that bright light is known as the "sun"). It's a movie about dating and dealing with break ups that is mildly offensive to women. But it is also mildly amusing, and besides, it's always good to see what the other team is saying about yours (this is coming from a guy who read "He's Just Not That Into You" for perspective). The overwhelming lesson learned from the movie Swingers is the 2-day industry standard (the amount of time one must wait to call after obtaining a new phone number). It seems every guy I know has adopted this strategy and all adamantly refuse to call within 36 hours of getting a number. And I'm tired of it.

This practice has become so widespread with guys that women now expect us to wait at least 2 days. I'm over it! Some guys will tell you to wait longer, 3 days, 4 days, 6 days even. Hell, why not wait a month?

What really bakes my bread is the reason why guys do this; we're supposed to wait so as to not seem too excited. "Hey, I really didn't like you that much. In fact I hadn't even thought about you in a week. Actually, I just found your number in my wallet...how do I know you again?"

Why would women ever go out with that? Sure, that's not what guys are saying, but it's the image they're trying to portray. I can understand the need to not seem overly anxious; no one wants to appear desperate. But if I had to wait more than a few days for someone to call, I would have written them off or given up on them already. It's not that waiting 2 days is deplorable; it's that calling the next day has somehow become unacceptable. If I'm excited, if I want to see you again, I don't want to be judged because I liked you enough to call the next day. Who cares if I call the next day?

Help me out here. I'm not asking that everyone start calling their new interest within 24 hours of meeting them. But at least help me bring some common sense back into the mix by not judging anyone for doing so.